Not where I thought I'd be....

Ever have one of those days when you look at your life and say something along the lines of "This is not where I thought I'd be"?

We all have visions of what life will be like when we reach a certain age, then life happens and it's not at all what we expected. No one thinks at 45, 50, 55, 60 (if they ever think of themselves being that old) that they will be looking for a job and starting over; or dealing with middle aged weight gain, teenagers who think they are stupid, and a loss of dreams.

We think we'll be like the commercials - going on vacations to Disney with children who think we are wonderful, eating out with friends who are as witty as we are, and taking romantic cruises with our spouse who still thinks we are the "cat's meow." Instead, life gives us vacations at home because there's not enough money, eating at the drive thru while we rush from one appointment to another, and if we are lucky, falling asleep in front of the tv with our spouse because that's about all the energy we have left. Oh yes, life also gives us an endless supply of bills, bills, bills - and not the spending kind! I don't know about you, but this is definitely not where I thought I'd be...

I got to wondering, did the disciples ever feel that way, too? When I thought about this, my mind went back to the last chapter of John. I imagined the disciples there, sitting on a boat (John 21: 1-3) and thinking this is not where they thought they'd be at all.

They had followed Jesus for years and were expecting Him to usher in His Kingdom, and instead He'd been crucified. They had made it through those painful three days before the resurrection, and had seen Him face to face once again. So how come they are back where they started - sitting in that fishing boat? Not just back in the same boat - it was even worse. This time they were catching NOTHING! (Been there a few times myself!)

Along comes Jesus, who of course they don't recognize. (I have to admit this is of some comfort to me when I fail to recognize the voice of God in my own life...I mean, the disciples missed it a time or two themselves and look at all they had seen!) Jesus calls out to them and says "You don't have any fish, do you:" Gee, thanks for rubbing salt into the wound whoever you are! There's nothing like having someone else point out just how fruitless your work has become. They had started out following Jesus on the adventure of a lifetime, but now they were right back where they'd started, and it seemed like nothing they tried was working anymore.

Yet Jesus tells them to cast their nets out again, trusting nothing but His Word this time. You know the story, they bring in so many fish they can barely pull the net into the boat! (vs 6)

Fast forward to the beach, (vs 9) and the disciples find Jesus with a fire built and fish already cooking...seems He didn't have to wait on what they brought to the table. He invited the disciples to bring what they had caught as well, but it wasn't with their catch that He fed them. It was what He provided. What a beautiful picture of bringing our offering to the table and instead of asking God to bless what we're doing, joining in with what He already has planned.

I heard a Christian recording artist say recently that he was no longer asking that God use him to make the difference, but simply that God make the difference. His ego was out of the picture, he simply wanted God's will to be done no matter who He chose to use in the process....even if that meant NOT using him. In turn, it seems that God has used him more than ever!

Back to the disciples. I kind of get the feeling that they were then where some of us find ourselves now - not where they'd expected to be. This wasn't how life was supposed to turn out. Their dreams had died and even though they knew God was still God, they figured it was pretty much over for them. But God had something else in mind....He told them to throw their nets on the other side. They were not done yet.

Maybe that's what God is saying to us today? Maybe it's not time to let the dream die...maybe it's time to cast the dream again only this time in a different way. Maybe, just maybe, He's not done with us yet.

I have to wonder will we be as surprised as those disciples were when our nets/dreams come back full this time. Will we be just as amazed when no matter how full, the nets don't break? And will we be fed when we bring our offering to add in to what He is already doing in the earth?

Life has a funny way of taking you on a journey you weren't expecting. At this point in my life,  this isn't where I thought I'd be....but I can't wait to see where He takes me from here.  I hope to see you on the journey...and that we catch a lot of fish this time!

I'd love to hear from you...what dreams is God telling you to "cast out" one more time?

John 21



Jesus and the Miraculous Catch of Fish


1Afterward Jesus appeared again to his disciples, by the Sea of Tiberias.[a] It happened this way: 2Simon Peter, Thomas (called Didymus), Nathanael from Cana in Galilee, the sons of Zebedee, and two other disciples were together. 3"I'm going out to fish," Simon Peter told them, and they said, "We'll go with you." So they went out and got into the boat, but that night they caught nothing. 4Early in the morning, Jesus stood on the shore, but the disciples did not realize that it was Jesus. 5He called out to them, "Friends, haven't you any fish?" "No," they answered. 6He said, "Throw your net on the right side of the boat and you will find some." When they did, they were unable to haul the net in because of the large number of fish. 7Then the disciple whom Jesus loved said to Peter, "It is the Lord!" As soon as Simon Peter heard him say, "It is the Lord," he wrapped his outer garment around him (for he had taken it off) and jumped into the water. 8The other disciples followed in the boat, towing the net full of fish, for they were not far from shore, about a hundred yards.[b] 9When they landed, they saw a fire of burning coals there with fish on it, and some bread. 10Jesus said to them, "Bring some of the fish you have just caught." 11Simon Peter climbed aboard and dragged the net ashore. It was full of large fish, 153, but even with so many the net was not torn. 12Jesus said to them, "Come and have breakfast." None of the disciples dared ask him, "Who are you?" They knew it was the Lord. 13Jesus came, took the bread and gave it to them, and did the same with the fish. 14This was now the third time Jesus appeared to his disciples after he was raised from the dead.

The Journey Back to Running, Part 1

I am a runner....reallly I feel like that should say "I WAS a runner" because right now I'm not so sure I can claim that title....and the journey back to running is a hard one.

When I first started running in 2006, it was a new experience for me. While I had run a little in high school, I was really never much of an athlete. There was one race I won simply because no other school had anyone to enter into the mile event. They put their best sprinters in, but they didn't know how to keep plodding along for an entire mile. That race looked like a real live "Tortoise and Hares" kind of race. I was thrilled, but even I knew I wasn't really much of a runner....they were just unprepared.

Fast forward 30 years (yes, it took that many years before I started running again.) We had just come through Hurricane Katrina and I was discovering a new lifestyle of fitness that I really enjoyed. I had gotten used to the heat, thanks to no electricity for two weeks, and I was losing weight, thanks to reduced food being readily available....did I mention we'd had a hurricane? I even was getting used to exercise thanks to having to haul limbs and trees from my front yard, wet clothes from my destroyed closet, and construction debris from my house while we tried to repair the rooms. In the midst of all this, I discovered the program "Biggest Loser", thanks in part to only having one station that would come in clearly after the storm. That show became my inspiration and motivation to hit the gym.

After about 7 months of exercising on a regular basis, I  decided to enter a race to celebrate my 48th birthday. It was a 5K and it seemed like such a HUGE distance, but I was determined to give it a try. I signed up and then started increasing my time on the treadmill in hopes of not being too embarassed at the race. Truthfully, I still had no thoughts of myself as an athlete. I was just having fun.

Race day came and I not only ran part of the course, I actually won my age division....thanks once again to no one else in my age bracket showing up for the race. Still, I didn't care. I was hooked. I was so proud of my first place medal that day. I still, however, didn't really consider myself a runner.

For the next few weeks, I continued going to the gym to run/walk on the treadmills. Then on my way home one day, I saw a woman at our school track setting up cones so I decided to ask what she was doing. She was from the local runners club and they were beginning a 12 week training course for 5K's. She encouraged me to come. I gave her the old, "I'll try", and went home. It had been a particularly tough day and I just wanted to collapse on my couch and feel sorry for myself. Somehow, her encouragement kept ringing in my head and before I knew it I was lacing up my shoes and heading back out the door.

I came to the training pretty faithfully. To be honest, I remember being amazed at myself. I had never been that consistent with any form of exercise in my life! Each week I could see a bit of improvement in my abilities...but I still didn't see myself as a runner, especially not since I was out there with people who were running 5K's so much faster than me. Looking back, I realize that during those beginning days at the track, I was surrounded by some of the most encouraging people I had ever known in my life. Each runner was working on becoming better, and eager to help others do the same. They kept me coming back. The most encouraging person of all was our "coach." She was a few years older than me, but able to run faster and longer than women half her age. She saw in me what I could not see in myself.

I distinctly remember the race when I signed my name as Donna "the runner" Sumrall. I did it as a joke, but also as a motivator to myself. Coach had been telling me for weeks I had to start seeing myself as a runner; on that day, as an act of will, I decided to do just that. I don't remember if I even placed in that race, but I do remember how I felt when I crossed the finish line. I felt like I could do anything I put my mind to.

With each week, I continued to run, even setting my sights on a half marathon. I ran that half marathon and had a blast....and then I quit running. No, I didn't quit running as much. I quit running. One week turned into one month that turned into one year that turned into two. I'd make sporadic attempts at getting back into a routine, but something was different; something was missing.

Over the next two years, I continued to run, but not with the joy or success I once knew; and I miss that. So now what do I do? Well, like most people who somehow get off course, I've decided to go back to the beginning and start again. For me, that means hitting the gym on an almost daily basis and then joining others training for a 5K. Tomorrow night is the first meeting of the 12 weeks, and I plan to be there. Will I be able to find my way back to the joy of running? Good question. I guess I'll find out, and you'll be able to read about the answer in the coming weeks. Hopefully the answer lies ahead and it won't take 30 years to find it this time.


For those in the Hattiesburg area, the Pinebelt Pacers will begin their 12 week training this Tuesday, June 15th at the Thames track. Come join in what some of us call "fun".
Hebrews 12:1, GOD'S WORD® Translation (©1995)

"Since we are surrounded by so many examples [of faith], we must get rid of everything that slows us down, especially sin that distracts us. We must run the race that lies ahead of us and never give up."

Time to cut through the.....

It's time to look at the only part of our armor that is not just for defense. It's time to look at the Sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God. I love this part, because it's time to cut through the, shall we say, fertilizer, that the world tosses at us every day. It's time to cut through the excuses, the reasons, the blaming, the...well, manure, that keeps us from becoming the person God intended for us to be!

I love the Word of God. It has the ability to cut right through all the garbage that clouds our judgement. It somehow can make the murky waters of decision crystal clear. The Word can take the arguments of man and reveal them for what they are....
The Word has gotten a bad rap from many. I have no doubt that some have used God's Word like some sort of religious machete, swinging it willy nilly toward anyone who got in their way. But from what I understand, the Word isn't to be used like that. It is more of a weapon that destroys the things that would keep us from God...not something used to destroy us!
I know personally that I have had times of struggle when the Word of God has helped me make it through. It has cut through all the ropes and chains of confusion and given me hope to carry on. The Word has been a weapon to defeat the discouragement and lies that the enemy would try to use against me. His Word has been what can cut through the disception and bring TRUTH into focus.

The more of God's Word I know, the bigger/stronger my sword. I can go into battle with just a little of His Word, but that is a bit like charging into the fray with a pocket knife. Personally, I prefer a much sharper and more effective weapon!

There is much that has been written about the Sword of the Spirit, but one sentence keeps ringing in my head. It's time to cut through the garbage....it's time to know God's Word.
.
Psalm 33:4-5 (Message translation):
For God's Word is solid to the core; everything he makes is sound inside and out.
He loves it when everything fits, when his world is in plumb-line true.
Earth is drenched in God's affectionate satisfaction.

Hebrews 4:12 - 13 (Message translation):
God means what he says. What he says goes. His powerful Word is sharp as a surgeon's scalpel, cutting through everything, whether doubt or defense, laying us open to listen and obey. Nothing and no one is impervious to God's Word. We can't get away from it—no matter what.

Breaks your heart

Ever heard a mom say something along the lines of "break your mother's heart?" I'm starting to understand what that means. Don't get me wrong. My two are truly a blessing and MOST of the time, things are going just fine. Then there are those times.....
As a parent, you want so much to help your kids through life's trials, but the world has done a pretty good job convincing them that as parents, we "just wouldn't understand." Can't say this generation is any worse about it than those in the past....how many remember the phrase, "Never trust anyone over 30"? For the past few 50 years we've been moving away from the "Father knows best" toward "My parents are clueless" attitudes. I guess I was as guilty as the rest. I remember thinking at 10 my parents hung the moon. By the time I was 14, they were getting a bit senile. When I hit 18, I pretty much knew it all and my poor old parents were just OLD! Then a funny thing started happening. I got to my early 20's and started calling my parents for a bit of advice. By 30, I was calling on a regular basis! Now that I'm in my 50's, I can't tell you how many times I have wanted to call them and just say I was sorry for being such an idiot all those years and WISHING I could ask them for their advice just one more time. I know this isn't something new to just me. Mark Twain is quoted as saying, "When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years."
Now I am the parent and I have to sit by and watch my own children struggle with things that I might be able to help with, but they think I won't understand. They shut me out, sometimes talking to their peers, but rarely to their parents. Then I got to wondering if I do the same thing toward God. The world does a number on us telling us that God just won't understand; that He'll be too disappointed in us if we struggle; that He's just too out of touch with us to understand. But the world is wrong.
As a parent, I may over-react, get angry or simply be clueless as to how to help...but God doesn't really have that problem. He knows just what to do. He knows exactly how to mend the broken heart, bring direction to the path, or simply clean up the mess of a life...if we simply come to Him. He longs to help us! In Matthew 23:37, Jesus spoke these words, "Jerusalem! Jerusalem! .... How often I've ached to embrace your children, the way a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you wouldn't let me." Sounds like words I wanted to say to my own children at times.
Teens seem to build a wall to protect themselves, but these walls actually shut out those who love them and want to help. That is why as parents we must fight for them....and fight again. In the words of my pastor, "Sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do." This is a battle we cannot give up on. Even though the words "I'm just so tired" come from my mouth more often than I'd like, I can thank heavens that our Savior never grows weak or weary. No one can measure the depths of His understanding and I am not in this fight alone.
Do I expect my children to come running to me for advice tomorrow? Not likely. But I will continue to fight for them, pray for them, and know that God loves them even more than me. Come to think of it, I think it's probably time to seek His advice and ask HIM what to do.

I hate hills.....

Okay, I know that as a runner I'm supposed to love hills. I've participated in races where the course was described as having "gentle, rolling hills" and let me tell you whoever wrote that lied! There was absolutely nothing gentle about those hills. They went on forever! And even though the race doubled back to the start, I still haven't figured out how I wound up running uphill both ways! I live in South Mississippi for crying out loud! Where are all these hills coming from?!?

I hate hills. I'm not exactly what you'd call poetry in motion when I run anyway, but when I encounter hills, things gets downright ugly! My heart starts beating out of my chest, my face gets flushed, I start sweating so hard I look like I got caught in a sudden cloud burst, and I run SLOW!!! I hate hills...have I mentioned that before?

I can't be the only one who struggles with hills. Why, even the writer of Psalms 121 said, "I lift up my eyes to the hills—where does my help come from?" The King James version says, "I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help." I used to think that verse meant I looked up to God in some sort of spiritual utopia. Then I read the verse in other versions and realized the author was calling out for help! Seems that he wasn't looking forward to having to take that hill either!

Still, I am coming to realize what most runners already know, hills build strength. Seasoned runners look at hills as an opportunity to become stronger and therefore, faster. They know those hills will eventually benefit them and allow them to win the race!

Life is full of hills, chances to become stronger than what we are. The question is, will I look at those hills/trials as a good thing? Will I choose to remember during the battle uphill that somehow God is going to use this for my good and His glory? As my heart is pounding and every part of me hurts feeling as though this trial will never end, can I keep going? Will I look back at hills past and remember that God is faithful and never leaves me nor forsakes me? Will I look at this trial as yet another chance for God to make me stronger so that I can run the race set before me? Will I learn to give thanks even for those "hills"? If so, it could really change the way I look at life! Those hills serve a purpose!

In Romans 5: 3-5, this is described for us. "There's more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we're hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. In alert expectancy such as this, we're never left feeling shortchanged. Quite the contrary—we can't round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit!"

The rest of Psalm 121 tells me how I will be able to do all this: "My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.  He will not let your foot slip— he who watches over you will not slumber;  indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep." I'm not running up this hill alone. He is there to hold me up, even to the point that I can almost feel his hand on my back gently encouraging me to go on. He does not ask me to do anything that He is unwilling to do with me. He's taken this hill before and He came back to help me do the same.

Can't say I'll ever learn to love hills, but maybe I'll learn to not dread them quite so much from now on. Perhaps the urge to quit and sit down won't seem quite so attractive now. After all, I've got a race to run, and I want to run it well....for I'm running for the prize! I want to hear "Well done" when my race is through.

More encouragement for the "Hills of Life".....

Hebrews 12: 1-3 (Message translation): "Do you see what this means—all these pioneers who blazed the way, all these veterans cheering us on? It means we'd better get on with it. Strip down, start running—and never quit! No extra spiritual fat, no parasitic sins. Keep your eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race we're in. Study how he did it. Because he never lost sight of where he was headed—that exhilarating finish in and with God—he could put up with anything along the way: Cross, shame, whatever. And now he's there, in the place of honor, right alongside God. When you find yourselves flagging in your faith, go over that story again, item by item, that long litany of hostility he plowed through. That will shoot adrenaline into your souls!"

Isa 40:31 (NIV) But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

Phil. 3:12 - 14 "Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

Acts 20:24 "However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace."

Matthew 25:21 "His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!'

Don't go losing your head, Part 2

I can think of absolutely no good reason for me to be awake at 4:30 this morning. I don't have to be at work today, so why in the world did my eyes pop open so blooming early? Oh yeah, now I remember why....I had a nightmare.

Now as nightmares go, this one wasn't too bad, but it was at least heart pumping enough that I am now awake and can pretty much remember what was going on. In this dream, I was being taunted by someone who was much bigger and who obviously could do me harm. He was making veiled threats and I could tell I was in real danger. Fortunately, someone came into the room and distracted him, and I made my get away. I had gotten outside and was going down a dark outdoor hallway toward my car. I was walking as fast as I could, which wasn't nearly as fast as normal because I was wearing heels! Just as I reached the door, I felt the person's hand grab my shoulder. That's when I woke up.

So what's all this got to do with the helmet of salvation? The helmet is a part of our armor designed to keep us from losing our head....and to protect our mind. Our mind is a powerful tool! It registers things we think it doesn't and then processes them later on while we think we are doing nothing...like sleeping! It's important to keep your mind safe, to not allow it to be hit by the enemy. We are given the helmet of salvation to help protect our minds from the enemy's arrows. Last night, however, I took off my helmet.

No, I wasn't out on the town, and I wasn't doing anything that most people would consider even remotely harmful. I was just sitting on the couch watching TV. As I was flipping channels looking for something to watch, (that should have been a sign right there to turn the stupid thing off), I came across a show that I really like. I won't say the name of it in case it's one of your favorites, but it had to do with people who commit crimes against others. As I think about it, it has to do with the mind as well. Anyway, I am pretty careful to change the channel if something gory comes on, but this episode wasn't gory. It was about a stalker. I watched only a few minutes and then finally listened to that little voice inside (that was by now practically screaming at me) and changed the channel. Evidently, I didn't change it fast enough because I'm pretty sure that's where my dream came from.

As I lay there in the dark thinking about the weird dream and wishing I could go back to sleep, I thought back to an moment from over 20 years ago. My husband and I were taking a movie back to the rental place and as I looked at the movie title in my hand I had a conversation with God. It was actually more of a "listen to God." You know, one of those times when you know that you know what you are hearing is His voice in your heart. I sat there looking at the movie cover and this is what I heard. "Why do you ask me to station angels round your house and then you walk right past them and carry this inside?" I could see the picture very clearly. I had asked God to protect me and my home, yet I went boldly up the steps to the front door and right past the angels. They were there to keep me safe, but they would not, could not interfere when I made the choice to walk past them carrying destruction right into the house myself.

I have never forgotten that day. I'm not perfect...sometimes I still find myself bringing things in and hoping the angels are looking the other way, but the only one I'm really fooling is myself. I know that the way things get into my heart is through my eyes and ears. It only takes a tiny seed of fear, doubt, or evil to take root in the fertile soil of my mind, and the next thing you know I've got a full grown forest of problems. The best way to keep that from happening is to keep my helmet on and not allow the enemy access to do any planting!

I'm not presuming to tell others what to do. I'm only testifying to what I have seen to be true in my life. I have to keep my helmet on because my enemy is prowling around like a lion looking for whom he may devour. I don't want to be his next snack! That means I have to be aware of what I allow in. I can't mindlessly watch TV or listen to the radio, or even the idle conversations of some people! If I do, I'll find myself with a mess before I know it! It's sort of like that "spot" that everyone has in their house. You know the one...it's that one surface where if you allow yourself to put one thing down on it, the next thing you know you'll have a tower of stuff covering the spot. If I'm not careful, I can allow the same thing to happen with my mind. I mindlessly put things there and before I know it I've got a tower of junk to deal with! I'm better off not putting the junk there in the first place.

As I end today's random thought, I am reminded of a children's song, "Oh be careful little eyes what you see; oh be careful little eyes what you see. For the Father up above is looking down in love. Oh be careful little eyes what you see." As for me, I think it's time I  had another cup of coffee. The five minutes of that show I watched last night stole a lot more than 5 minutes of my sleep! It's also time to put my helmet back on!

“Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.” 1 Peter 5:8

Barbie and me....and the velveteen rabbit

I just came to a sobering realization. Barbie and I are the same age. This just doesn't seem right. If we are the same age, how come she's not going grey, fighting middle age weight gain, trying to minimize wrinkles, and sagging in places she'd really rather not sag? I have to wonder, is she getting junk mail from AARP like I am? Does she get spam trying to sell her a Hover-round? Has she received offers for low cost burial policies? I don't think so!!!

No, Barbie is sporting around in her new car while I count coins so I can put gas into my van. All she has is a cute carry one bag to toss in the back while she and Ken go off on another adventure. I push the homework papers, fast food cups, and kid's backpacks out of the way just to get in! No wonder she never ages.

But I'm not Barbie. (I know, I'm as shocked as you are!) I wake up and my hair is NOT perfect, there are circles under my eyes, and if you're smart you won't talk to me until after my second cup of coffee. I go off to a job that I love, but that is filled with mundane paperwork, sometimes disrespectful children, and endless stress. I wear hand-me-down clothes (sometimes from my daughter's closet) and come home to a house that always seems to need cleaning. I have less than perfect children, dogs that sometimes pee in on the floor, and a husband that watches racing, hunting shows, and old westerns. My life is not filled with adventures and romance. It is filled with struggles and even some disappointments....and I wouldn't trade with Barbie for anything in the world.

The grey in my hair hopefully signals at least a little wisdom. My less than perfect children make me laugh, cry, pray, pray, pray, and give me more joy than I knew was possible. My husband is my friend...not everyone can say something like that. He makes me laugh and stands by me - even in the morning. In fact, he gets up first and makes the coffee! And the dogs....well, I still wish they didn't pee on the floor, but even they are such loveable mutts they make me feel like I'm far more worthy of their love than I know I am.

I'm not Barbie; I'm real. I'm getting older and much to my dismay, it shows. There are wrinkles from laughing, and a few from worry. There are aches and pains that I'm pretty sure plastic never feels. I've been living life now for over 50 years and there have been a few bumps along the way, and everyone has left a mark or two.

I guess I'd like to be "holding up" as well as my plastic counterpart, but I'm not. I'm not even holding up as well as many other 50 year olds I know. Still, I am alive....and hopefully, I am real. Being alive and real hurts sometimes, but it really is worth it. This brings to mind a passage from a well known story, The Velveteen Rabbit by Margery Williams :

 "The Skin Horse had lived longer in the nursery than any of the others. He was so old and most of the hairs in his tail had been pulled out to string bead necklaces. For nursery magic is very strange and wonderful, and only those playthings that are old and wise and experienced like the Skin Horse understand all about it.

"What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"

"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."

"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.

"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."

"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"

"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in your joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."

"I suppose you are real?" said the Rabbit. And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse might be sensitive. But the Skin Horse only smiled.

"The Boy's Uncle made me Real," he said. "That was a great many years ago; but once you are Real you can't become unreal again. It lasts for always."

I want to be real, even if it means I'm not as perfect as Barbie. I'm pretty sure I'd rather be a rabbit any day.

 

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. Prov. 31:30