Sunday, November 8, 2009

There I go...talking to myself again.

It's an old see someone talking to themselves and joke about it. The thing is, we all do it; talk to ourselves, I mean. I used to say I was just looking for some intelligent conversation, but the truth is, I'm looking for someone who will listen to me.

That's just it...we listen to ourselves. Sometimes we think we don't. We catch ourselves and what we are saying by the phrase, "Listen to what you are saying." But even when we think we AREN'T listening...we are. Our bodies and spirit are listening 24/7 to a surround sound of ourselves. We are constantly being affected by what we are saying. Makes it even more important to "be careful little mouths what you say."

Occasionally, I find myself in a real funk. I'm in a bad mood and there seems to be no good reason. The weather may have changed and it does play havoc with my body as I get older, or the stress of my bank balance getting low may put stress on my already weakened cheerful disposition, but truthfully, I have no good reason for my bad mood. If I am honest with myself, my bad mood may be a result of talking to myself again. I may not be doing it out loud, but I'm talking to myself all the same. When someone does something that I don't like, I may hold my tongue - which is a good thing, but inside myself I complain and argue with things I wish I could say. Oh yes, I'm constantly talking inside.

I have to wonder if others do this. I think they must because even in the Bible we have a record of the David saying "Why so downcast, oh my soul?" This isn't some new phenomenon that only crazy old lady teachers experience. It's human nature. We listen to ourselves....the key is to be careful of what we are saying. Change our focus. Speak words of life instead of the other kind.

When I fail, which happens quite often...stop saying negative things to myself. When I succeed, be careful of who I tell myself the credit belongs to. When life destroys my dreams, remember the one who can raise dry bones and speak new life into them. When my bank account gets low, remember that my Father holds me and every situation in the palm of His hands and has promised to work all things for my good and His glory. When others hurt me, I've got to trust that the Lord sees and fights my battles for me...and I must choose to let things go.

This is not an easy thing to do. It's much easier to fill my days with the influences of the world and its way of doing things. No one is forcing me to fill my life with negative things.  I choose what I watch on tv, listen to on the radio, and words that I repeat. It's pretty easy to go with the flow and do what everyone else is doing. It is a lot tougher to change direction and go against the flow. For some reason, as I typed this, I got the mental picture of lemmings all rushing toward the edge of a cliff. I'll bet going against that stampede is tough....but going with it is certain destruction.

So, for today at least, I'm going to watch what I'm saying to myself. I'm going to try to "be careful little eyes what you see, little ears what you hear, and little mouth what you speak." Like Psalms 42:5, 11, and 43:5 say, (which by the way shows me that I will have to repeat these things to myself OFTEN), "Why so downcast, oh my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise Him, my Savior and my God." Seems like it's gonna be a little tough to stay in a bad mood while I'm doing that.

"May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer." Psalms 19:14

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