Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Memories fading?

Last night, my pastor told me that we'd be "sharing" about our experience in Cambodia next week and my immediate thought was - "That's too far away! The memories are beginning to fade!" The past week I have been living with the keen awareness that the memories that seemed so alive and fresh are beginning to fade like a bad polaroid. (Those of you who remember the first "instant" cameras know what I mean by this. The pictures slowly formed right before your eyes, but it didn't take much longer for those snapshots of time to fade as well!)

But I don't want to forget.

I don't want to forget the sweet young man who worked at our hotel, watching over us and so happy to serve his fellow man. I don't want to forget the sight of the children waving to us from the street. The faces of so many passing each other in the midst of the busy, noisy city. The worship in the Khmer church. The sharing with the Khmer workers who displayed such mercy and grace for ones so young. And there was the time I got to spend with our "team". I so enjoyed meeting with them for coffee in the mornings and fellowship at the evening meal...don't want to forget that either. 

Pictures do help, but even these don't capture the moment. I wish I could go back and live every second a little more fully. I find myself looking forward to going back and recreating the moment, but knowing the moment has passed. 

Isn't that like life in general?

We look at pictures of our children and wish we could "go back" for a moment and kiss those cubby cheeks. We remember our parents, now gone on before, and wish we could wrap our arms around them one more time. We think back to who we were as teens and young adults and wish we could go back and tell ourselves a few things about life....or Gibbs slap ourselves in the back of the head. We wander back, trying to recreate a moment in time.

We can't "go back" - not for a do-over or for a live-over...but we can move forward, and we can keep the memory alive.

I know I can't "go back" to that week, but I long to "go back" and be with the people I met while I was in Cambodia. The faces of the children are before me in my prayers each day. I anxiously look for "updates" from the other side of the world....all keep the memories alive and help me move forward. The Lord willing, I will go to Cambodia AGAIN....cause I guess that while it's not possible to go "back", we can jump in with what God is doing today!

Isaiah 43:19

The Message (MSG)
16-21 This is what God says,
    the God who builds a road right through the ocean,
    who carves a path through pounding waves,
The God who summons horses and chariots and armies—
    they lie down and then can’t get up;
    they’re snuffed out like so many candles:
“Forget about what’s happened;
    don’t keep going over old history.
Be alert, be present. I’m about to do something brand-new.
    It’s bursting out! Don’t you see it?
There it is! I’m making a road through the desert,
    rivers in the badlands.
Wild animals will say ‘Thank you!’
    —the coyotes and the buzzards—
Because I provided water in the desert,
    rivers through the sun-baked earth,
Drinking water for the people I chose,
    the people I made especially for myself,
    a people custom-made to praise me.

Philippians 3:13 The Message (MSG)

Focused on the Goal

12-14 I’m not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don’t get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I’ve got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward—to Jesus. I’m off and running, and I’m not turning back.

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