Discouragement was clinging to me like a wet blanket, pressing in on my skin and hindering my every move. I felt heavy. Tired. Like I'd missed God and had no way to turn things around. Discouragement wrapped around me like that wet blanket and made it hard to even breathe.
Ever have a week like that?
I wanted to run away. North Carolina looked pretty. Florida seems nice. Just about anywhere but here seemed like a good place to be.
What in the world was going on?
As I looked back at the previous weeks, I'd been weaving this wet blanket a little at the time. Dealing with a negative outlook here, a discouraging word there, a critical comment caught in passing...they each contributed a thread or two to the blanket. Before I knew it, I was adding my own threads and was feeling completed weighted down.
So what's a person to do? (Running away still sounded like a pretty good idea. I guess it's a good thing payday was still two weeks away and I didn't really have the money to run anywhere!)
I admit, it was tempting to just sit down and pull that soggy old blanket over my head and cry. Discouragement began to give way to anger and resentment. Anger at myself, anger at the situation, even anger at God! (Oh come on - don't tell me I'm the only person to ever get to that point!)
Then, slowly, that blanket became too uncomfortable to wear.
I started to see little things that reminded me what I needed to do.
It began with an email inviting me to join a Bible study with some new friends...friends that I knew not only loved God but loved laughter and had the ability to share their joy with others.
Next came an email inviting me to a painting party. Wow...I don't remember the last time I painted just for fun. Don't remember the last time I did ANYTHING just for fun.
I was slowly shrugging off the smelly old wet blanket that itched and made me so miserable.
Still, I knew that just throwing off the old wet blanket wasn't going to be enough.
I needed to weave a different one, choosing different threads along the way. This time, I needed to weave a blanket with God's Word.
Light. Warm. Comforting. Encouraging.
I'm so thankful that God is patient with me. He didn't fuss at me for weaving that awful wet blanket and then wrapping up in it...instead He sent messages of light so that I could toss that old wet thing to the side and replace it with the comforting blanket of His love.
It's up to us to choose which threads we weave into this blanket of our lives. The negative threads will still come our way, but I don't have to use them. I don't know about you, but I like God's blanket a lot more than the one I made by myself.
Psalm 55: 6-8 (Message)
“Who will give me wings,” I ask—
“wings like a dove?”
Get me out of here on dove wings;
I want some peace and quiet.
I want a walk in the country,
I want a cabin in the woods.
I’m desperate for a change
from rage and stormy weather.
Psalm 55:22a (Message)
Pile your troubles on God’s shoulders—
he’ll carry your load, he’ll help you out.
Colossians 2: 2-4 (Message)
2-4 I want you woven into a tapestry of love, in touch with everything there is to know of God. Then you will have minds confident and at rest, focused on Christ, God’s great mystery. All the richest treasures of wisdom and knowledge are embedded in that mystery and nowhere else. And we’ve been shown the mystery! I’m telling you this because I don’t want anyone leading you off on some wild-goose chase, after other so-called mysteries, or “the Secret.”